Electra

“Fifteen”

I waited and daydreamed, a Cinderella princess
I pictured you saving the day
I waited in anger, a knight in shining armor
To take all my troubles away

I was just fifteen, a miniature queen,
Knee-high in garbage, but I had a dream
Covered by the flies and all I despise,
I didn’t have much chance against the fury in their eyes:
The guilty lies

You came and I gave you an open-ended question,
Invited you into my sin
But you wouldn’t give me a sympathetic answer
I had to make you begin

Fighting with my pride, justice on our side,
Angry at evil, I laughed when they died
You could stay so calm with blood on your palm,
You didn’t hate it or love it, but it made you belong:
I think it was wrong

Now we are lying in guilt and shame forever,
But you want to leave it behind
I cannot leave here—how can I wish for comfort?
I don’t want a sanctified mind

You know that it’s your sin. How can you grin?
If you didn’t come here, how could we begin?
And now that I’m in pain, drowning in shame,
I know it was my dream, but you take the blame:
You don’t feel the same

You say it would be better if I’d take a stand
Decide that I’m in charge and take my fate in hand
I’m too exhausted to let go of fortune’s apron string
I don’t want to be responsible for everything

I wish I were fifteen, a miniature queen,
Wondering what life is, nursing my dream
Covered in the flies and all I despise,
Waiting for someone who’s strong in my eyes:
The fury and the lies